Taking care.

I don't think I'd like to be a doctor because of time. Somehow I see doctors don't really have enough time to take care of their own families as much as they have to serve their patients. Not that it is wrong but perhaps I would like to fill all my times with my own family.

Truth to be told, in my family we don't express or show our love that audibly. It would rather turned out sort of awkward to be saying 'I love you' out loud. Well maybe at some moments they aren't but to randomly come up with it, is.

I would really love to earn the knowledge of a doctor's. But to work as one, like I said, I prefer taking care of my own family first.

Ibu has been bedridden for two days now. Kaklang said it might be dengue but the blood test result is not yet out or so I was told. My heart really breaks into million pieces every time I hear Ibu whimper in pain. And whenever she contorts her face, trying to hold the pain back, I with all the forces I have in me try hard not to tear up in front of her.

I am so used to having Ibu doing everything that I have no idea how to do her things when the situations change. I need to start learning how to do all this sort of stuff. One problem of mine is that I still see myself as only a little helpless child that I don't think I have the privilege to do things. And sometimes people around me treats me as if I am still a child as well. Well I guess it's time to finally come out of my own comfort zone isn't it?

InsyaAllah. In the name of Allah the Most Gracious the Most Merciful. Till we meet again :)