Time.

It feels like I'm living three different worlds right now. No, four.

One ; with Mia and Bit

Two ; with Machinants

Three ; with PASUM friends

Four ; with Malaccans

Let me add just one more to the list.

Five ; with family

Actually, there's one more

Six ; when I'm all alone

Sometimes I feel so bad for not spending enough times with my family. Sometimes I feel bad for always declining invitations from friends to hang out.

But sometimes, I feel like banging someone in the head for expecting me to have all the time in the world to hang out with them. Sometimes I feel like shooting someone right through his/her heart for expecting me to stop doing my routine to spend time with them.

I've always put my family first. Sometimes I'd come out from my crib to hang out. Sometimes I'd take a little break from fetching Adik from school and sending Kakcik to her tuition centre to spend time with some friends.

But sometimes you can't expect me to always agree and think I'm always ditching out when I say I couldn't make it. That's not fair. It has been a while since we last met, but I have been away from home for quite a few moments too. I need to help out around the house when I get the chance. I'm sure you get it, don't you?

I am not devoting this post to any of my friends. But if, if this nurin-is-always-busy-ditching-out-giving-excuses kind of thoughts ever cross your mind, please, no that I'm not doing any of it on purpose. I can't stand even thinking about how lethargic Ibu could be in one day rushing in and out of the house every single day. I can't.

I am terribly sorry to all my dear friends for haven't always be there for you. I am not a good friend, in fact I'm a terrible one.

I'm pretty sure pretty much everybody can relate to this. Everybody has got their own life, with different friends from different 'world'. But maybe I'm just not as tough as you guys are in handling all the 'world' in hand.

I'm deeply sorry.